2dp5dt

Everything feels different this time around. I think the relief from hearing the good news on transfer day has stayed with me, because I'm feeling ... dare I say it.. chipper? What? Me? WHO AM I? I don't know this person.

I'm determined to ignore any symptoms this time around and just try to go with the flow. I'm still feeling the occasional bit of pressure/cramping leftover from the egg retrieval, but my bloating is almost gone. Huzzah for buttoning up pants! Not only that, I'm on the terrific* progesterone combo of Crinone + vaginal pessaries, so they're turning me into a crazy person without any help whatsoever. Seriously... the oily feel of leaky progesterone is enough to make anyone happy, right? 

But really though, I can't explain the relief I have. Maybe it's knowing that we got lucky, that we CAN get to blastocyst stage? Maybe it's knowing we have two frozen embabies in storage, hopefully ready for future cycles. Maybe it's just hope, hope that this time will end in a different result? I don't know, and I kind of don't care. I'm just enjoying feeling human again. The folks at work (who all know we're doing IVF) commented today that I was looking great, and in a positive mood. My teaching assistant noted just how different I am this time, compared to the first time around. If other people are noticing, I must really be showing my mood.

Since my fertility clinic doesn't do beta testing, I waddled away from the embryo transfer with my knees together and with two home pregnancy tests in my hand. They've instructed me to wait until August 15th & then August 17th to pee. Ha. Hahahahaha. Right, lady. That'll happen. Chronic pee-er, right here. That is 9 days away... next Wednesday. Can I hold out? No promises.

What I DO know is that my Ovidrel trigger shot is already out of my system - got the stark white BFN on an internet cheapie this morning. At least I know that the answer won't be compromised, when I cave.

How are you feeling today? :) 

*insert sarcasm here