When will this crazy merry-go-round ever stop spinning? I would so very dearly love to NOT still be here. I'll be back on the pill for a few weeks, so there won't be a lot of exciting things happening.

I just turned 31 and while I'm never keen for another year to go by, I'm especially happy to leave my 30th year behind.

It started with such promise; I was 9 weeks pregnant, had seen our baby a few times & was so excited and thrilled to be able to have a second baby in my 30th year. That was my dream come true, made even sweeter since those babies were hard fought infertility ones. I had a great birthday, celebrated with friends and family, and Georgia was a delight - she had just turned 16 months old, was preparing to finally walk, and life was good.

That all ended 11 days later, when our 11 week ultrasound shocked us all... and the year just went pear-shaped from then on. Dealing with the loss of the pregnancy, finding out we were expecting a boy with Down Syndrome, gearing up to use our last embryo - only to have the joy of another pregnancy shattered with another miscarriage; it was a tough few months. Follow that by cycle after cycle of disappointments and negatives, as well as job craziness for hubby & the death of my Nan, well, I can't say I'm not glad to leave that all in the past.

Thank goodness for Georgia, and for family & friends. We're trying to move forward now, and try not to look back so much - easier said than done, but I'm trying. And that's all we can do right now - try.